Baseball vs. Congress

Professional baseball players sure look awkward when they are out of their element. That was my first thought when watching the replay on CSPAN last night.

McGwire was an embarassment. His comments were ridiculous. He looked funny with those reading glasses and weird skinny neck.

Sosa didn't know how to use the microphone and I didn't realize how badly he speaks english. I wonder if it was a defense mechanism. Like the some congressman asked him a question and he replied "I don't how to question..." and then starts shaking his head, like he doesn't understand anything. I wish I could find a transcript, all his answers were really strange.

Rafael Palmeiro looked insanely smooth. Like a big bottle of lotion. He had a nice denial and I was tempted to believe him. Maybe it was the smoothness.

Schilling looked the least like a professional athlete. I thought he was pretty stupid thinking that MLB could clean up it's own problem. I expected him to be smarter. I heard about him using all these computers to study hitters and such, so I thought he'd be kinda intelligent sounding. Turns out, not so much. (This from a guy who writes articles about the Pad Squad).

Canseco is just funny because he sincerely believe that he's smart. The way he really tries to put nice sentences together but they just never seem to work out.

They should give all these guys a night in jail for being dumb.